Dear Dr. Smartypants,
In college, I got involved in an organ-smuggling ring. We stored hearts and brains in the drink-machines to keep them cold. Unfortunately, a practical-joker shook up the cans before opening them, which busted the hearts, and statically charged the brains. What should I do?

Going to Pieces,
Pawtucket, ME

Dear Pieces,
I know I pound this drum a bit, but my meatball recipe (enclosed) is to die for. And it works great with organ meats.

Bon Appetit,
Dr. Smartypants

[cjw]